Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
The new, super hot, sexy bodied devil is called The Dailey Method. Pretty much what happens is they scream, "SurferWife, we want you to look hot, so you will spend the next 60 minutes doing the ugly cry. And we are going to look super cute with our really toned bodies while we make you beg for mercy."
Just to emphasize my point, I have dusted off my artistic skills and provided masterpieces that capture my suffering. What you are about to feast your eyes on is an exercise the little she-devils call, 'Seat Work.' In SurferWife terms, this is called 'getting your fat ass in shape.'
I lay on my back and assume it's night-night time. Just as I start to get cozy and release a snore, they insist I tuck my pelvis and 'squeeze my seat.' Right as I think I am handling this, fire ignites in the room and I am suddenly in Dante's Inferno. They have the audacity to ask me to lift my leg above my hip while my pelvis is tucking up. Within like one second, my body buckles and bats are screeching over my head, laughing at my pathetic-ness.
|This is when I realize I am screwed for the next 6 minutes|
Just as I start mentally writing my Last Will and Testament, the instructor, with the bright smile and perfect butt, tells me that now I need to tuck faster with my leg straight up, as if I am trying to get my foot to go through the ceiling.
I would like you all to try this right now, please. Go ahead, I'll wait.
|I'm fairly certain my body shouldn't be able to do this|
oh look, now she wants me to take that leg that's straight up in the air, out to the side while gyrating my pelvis up and down. Gee, now she is saying my leg needs to be straighter, STRAIGHTER, STRAIGHTER!!!
The fire stops, the screeching bats are gone, her devil horns have disappeared and I figure this was it. I am deceased and heading on to the pearly gates. I almost hear all of you pouring a little of your 40oz Olde E's out on the sidewalk in respect of my passing, ALA Tupac.
But no, it's my sweet instructor telling me I am done.
With the right side.
Put the left leg up and tuck, TUCK, TUCCCCCKKKKKK!!!
My ass better look like this by year's end or heads WILL roll. Pee Ess: Maybe I am a little dramatic, The Dailey Method isn't trying to kill me. Just slowly beat me into submission.
Someone get me some tater tots and a mojito. I'm pretty sure I deserve it.
Sunday, December 18, 2011
I can't help but find this whole situation amusing. It seems you have to either love him or hate him. Maybe my lack of caring about college football keeps me out of either group, but has there ever been a rookie QB to cause this much controversy throughout the league's fans? Not even Alex Smith could match it.
I will admit to laughing in awe with how little quarterbacking skill he used on those multiple comebacks. I even hoped he would do the same to the Pats just to watch the haters suffer and the worshippers continue with their ridiculousness. Sadly, he showed he really is human and not the 2nd coming. What will his followers do?
Whatever their reactions, I can't wait to be entertained by the extremes.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
There is so much going wrong with the players, the owners, and especially the commissioner.
The season is about to get underway and I can barely channel excitement for it. Yes, me the one in this group of fab ladies that is all NBA all the time, can barely think about the season starting. I KNOW.
The commissioner was the tip of the iceberg for this season. Mr. David Stern (henceforth known as Mr. Idiot) had the NBA League purchase the New Orleans' basketball team previously because they were in such financial difficulty (this was completely unheard of before, no one could believe it happened). Well, New Orleans wanted to trade Chris Paul to Cali, and Mr. Idiot didn't want that to happen so he halted the trade. The commissioner halted the trade. He didn't let it happen. First time for the NBA ever. Why would he care? No clue, but it was a dumb move. He'll be asked to step down once the season starts. If he doesn't, the NBA needs a new Board of Directors.
Then, my Mavericks. I'm so dissapointed, I've barely been able to even pay attention to trades. I know it could still work and it could still be an amazing season. I know. However, we traded my love, Tyson Chandler; we traded JJ Barea and Caron Butler. Three amazing players, three who helped to pave the way for our rise to glory. And who did we get? We got Mr. Kardashian himself, Lamar Odom. Yes, I know many girls are excited about this, because that means a Kardashian will be living in Dallas. You're preaching to the wrong choir girl on that front for me. I would rather scratch my eyes out that deal with that hot mess. Also, Odom is a dirty player. I don't like that, you don't have to play dirty to be a good player. In fact, to be a good player, you shouldn't have to play dirty.
The other trades, I don't really understand. And, it's happening all over with the teams. I'm just at a loss. It's like the league is falling apart at the seams. I'm already tired of what is to come. Because, I know it's going to get worse before it gets better. I'm just wondering what the owners and scouts have up their sleeves, cause it's gotta be better than what's happening right now. . . . right??
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Let me start by saying that I completely understand what I bought. I understand that buying stock in the Packers is really more like a donation. My stock will never make me any money. I'm totally ok with that. I love my team and I want them to prosper. So I gave them my money.
Last Tuesday there were articles written about how dumb Packers fans are for buying something "worthless". Worthless, you say? Because of my donation Lambeau field will get 6,700 more seats. And, the citizens of Green Bay won't have to pay for those seats through tax increases. Nope. The fans have taken that burden off the community. I'd say that's worth something.
I also have access to exclusive merchandise from the Packers Pro Shop and I get a fancy certificate with mine and my husbands name on it. See. Totally worth it! Was this an emotional purchase? Of course. This wasn't driven by logic. I know I just gave nearly $300 to the Packers and I personally get very little in return. But, really, I know women who buy shoes and purses that cost more than that. They wear them for a season and then what? They get their money back? No. I at least can take pride in the fact that I helped my team improve it's stadium.
Everyone knows that the Packers organization is unique. The have been a publicly owned, non-profit corporation since 1923 governed by a board of directors and executive committee. No other team is set up like that. It's part of the reason our fans are so insane. We know we have something special. When the opportunity came along to really become part of the Packers organization, I jumped. May my loyalty never be questioned.
And because I knew exactly what was being offered and decided to buy anyway, may my intelligence never be insulted.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Failing - 2
Hutch - 0
In October I decided to try again, signing up for the local Fleet Feet No Boundaries group. Putting myself in the run/walk group initially, I struggled with breathing and keeping a manageable pace. After my trip to Kentucky though something just clicked. I switched to the running group and a week later I ran a complete 4 miles, outdoors, for the first time ever! I'm not sure I've ever experienced a high like that before. I don't even know how to explain it. My body definitely surprised me.
Since then I've completed 6 miles with the training group and ran my first 5K. I understand why they say your race pace will be entirely different than how you train. I took almost 30 seconds off my mile pace that day and have managed to maintain on my shorter runs since.
I've already signed up for the Shamrockin' Half Marathon in March and of course the training group, which starts in January. This month I'm focusing on strengthening my legs and the nagging IT band issues. The quad roller (part of the Trigger Point set) is my new favorite torture device. If you have any kind of ITB or tightness issues toss the foam roller and use this. When I went in for Fleet Feet's trigger point class, the instructor said "If you haven't found religion yet, you will tonight." Um, yes. He was right.
|Ignore the lint, my carpet's a collector.|
I may only be running 1-2 days/week right now, but I itch to put on my shoes and get outside almost every day. It's official, whatever bit Cathy has come after me too!
I'm a runner.
|And I have pretty shoes! Yes, my feet are freakishly small.|
Friday, December 9, 2011
Boy, do I feel stupid.
The last player to mark that milestone was Evgeni Malkin.
Not only is RNH #1 in scoring among rookies, he is 7th overall in the entire NHL. I don't remember the last time the OIlers had a player in the top 40 scorers. So far this year, we have 3 players in the top 20 - RNH, Jordan Eberle, and the prodigal son, Ryan Smith.
RNH leads all NHL rookies in goals, this year, with 13. He leads in assists with 17 and, of course, total points with 30.
In 28 games.
That's more than a point per game.
There are only 16 players in the NHL right now that are averaging more than a point per game.
2 of them are Oilers.
The team is 2nd overall in at-home power plays at home, and 8th overall in the league - last year we had the worst power play in the league.
What a difference "The Nooge" makes.
Did I mention that he now holds the record for the earliest recorded hat-trick by an NHL #1 overall draft pick?
Wilzie and I finally attended our first game of the season, last week, and it felt different than it has in the last few years.
There was...excitement in the air.
People weren't just hanging out near the concessions drinking beer, they were actually watching the game. And they were cheering. There was even a wave!
That sort behaviour is unprecedented around here!
We even have a bonafide celebrity fan. Kevin Smith of Jay and Silent Bob fame is sporting a giant hard on for the Oilers - just check his twitter feed to see how often he talks about the team. He calls in to local radio shows to talk about last night's game and he filmed a bit for edmontonoilers.com showing off all of his Oilers memorabilia.
The team is still far from perfect - we lose games that should be a no-brainer, we fan on good chances and we take stupid penalties - there is potential shining through.
And you don't even need to squint to see it.
After 6 years of losing, of not only missing the playoffs completely, but coming in dead last the last 2 years in a row - Edmonton Oilers fans finally have something that we had almost given up on, entirely.
And it sure feels good.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Then there was the UK vs UNC game last week (also known as the game where I actually stopped breathing for 45 seconds) but an early season game is not necessarily an indicator of how we'll perform the next time we meet them...so no reason to get too excited and begin throwing around words like number one and NCAA Champions.
But the story that caught my eye was actually a 30 second blip on CNN International about a horse race in Hong Kong. And my take-away from that clip was that they race their horses clockwise in Hong Kong. That threw me. Because I'm used to watching my horses run counter-clockwise. I know it's counter-clockwise. I realize every decent day at the track is fueled with bloody marys and mojitos (or is it mojitoes?), but I'm pretty sure that even when I'm 6 sheets to the wind (note to self: look up why that's a euphemism for being wasted), I know which direction is clockwise. And we ain't got it.
So, the question is...which one of us is doing it wrong?
Thank God for Google.
From Askville.Amazon.com (although I'm mad at Amazon right now because they have apparently launched a campaign to underbid the small business, but that's a totally different post on a completely different blog):
Particularly horse racing is often run clockwise outside the US such as England, Continental Europe, Australia, and Hong Kong. The decision to run horses counterclockwise in the US dates to the American Revolution era. In 1780, the first circular US race track was established by William Whitley near his home in Lincoln County, Kentucky. A staunch supporter of the Revolution, Whitley insisted that horses race counterclockwise, as opposed to clockwise as was the custom at the time in England. Some but not all American tracks followed the change immediately. Belmont was run clockwise from its opening until 1921. Today about 30% to 40% of English horse racing is now counterclockwise like all horse racing in the US.
Imagine my surprise and delight when I learned that a Kentuckian was behind it all. So, yes...New York and California, you may try to boast that you are the horse racing capital, but it's right there in black and white...Kentucky determined which direction you would race your pretty little horses. And that pretty much settles the debate in my mind.
But it raises one other question. Y'know how, when you walk in the same direction on the track all the time, you get a little...er...unbalanced? I have always wondered if the same happened to jockeys...always racing in the same direction. So, now I'm intrigued. Do they pick up a few races outside the U.S. just to even themselves out a bit? I really need more jockey friends to ask these sorts of questions.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
But then I heard something that I thought was just awesome.
Cam Newton spotted a teenage girl sitting in the stands at the game wearing a t-shirt that said "Mrs. Newton" across the back. When he scored a touchdown, he went directly over to her and handed her the ball. I can only imagine how excited she was...he must have made her whole year.
As it turns out, that was a record setting touchdown...Newton's 13th for the season and the most by an NFL quarterback ever. The team eventually asked the girl for the ball back so it could go to the NFL Hall of Fame...but she didn't care. Just the fact that she got to singled out by Newton was enough for her.
It's awfully nice to hear good things like this. Well done, Cam...well done.
Friday, December 2, 2011
Meet The New Sports Drink: Pickle Juice
Oh yes, people. You read that right.
I used to give this to high school football players ALL THE TIME!!!!
See what happens is, it gets hot, or you are a heavy sweater and then you start to cramp up. The cramping from heat, we all get that, but what about your normal, run of the mill cramper - how does that happen? And WHY?!
My assumption was there was something inherent in their physiology that caused them too lose sodium or any other of the several key electrolytes too quickly and BLAMO! Cramps!
There are actually 2 old school grandma methods of cramp relief, as well as several "modern" ones.
1. Pickle Juice
I used to carry packets of mustard in my kit for when people cramped up. Chase it with some water, stretch and you are good to go.
The pickle juice, I always recommended as a preventative measure. Because it's hard to carry a jar of pickle juice around in your medical kit.
A shot every night, and an extra one before the game on game day. Worked great!
When you make pickles, you have to brine and marinate the cucumbers, making them shrivel, because of all the liquid lost. Well, brining mix has TONS of sodium in it, as well as other elements of what our body uses for electrolytes.
So if you or someone you love is a cramper, buy some pickles. Or yellow mustard.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
For weeks the owners were throwing numbers at the players trying to reach a settlement. The players kept rejecting all the numbers. These numbers are on top of their salaries they already receive.
I'm officially sad for the NBA. Each side is money hungry. There is no question about it. It's the business and it's expected. However, it's gotten worse than ever. The owners were actually trying to spread the wealth (somewhat) and make the smaller market teams more profitable . . . . you know, so they don't go bankrupt - because they are in jeopardy of it. The players? They are just trying to make more money. None of them are going bankrupt. For once, I'm siding with the owners. Never thought I'd say that.
I love the pace of the NBA, I love the excitement and the athleticism it brings to the court. I love that I grew up watching one team and it's still my favorite team to cheer for. I love that my team finally won the championship.
I'm sad that the players have just let their greed go wild. I'm sad that the owners were trying to keep the league going with the smaller markets, so that the league becomes less of one team always winning and more of a balanced market (think of the Yankees and baseball - they're trying to not be baseball and I respect that). They want good players to be in every city. Right now, the smaller markets can't afford the big paychecks people like Kobe require, so they tried to change the system to let the smaller markets get these bigger names. The players just couldn't let that happen. They wanted even bigger paychecks.
I could go on and on, but I won't. I'm dissapointed in the players. I'm dissapointed the owners got shut down. I'm dissapointed that it's come down to this. Sadly? I'm still excited for the season to start.
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
I've no doubt that all of you reading were watching the Packer/Lions game on Thursday. Ok fine. Maybe some of you were preparing your turkey and stuffing. Maybe some of you aren't even Packer fans (gasp!). I can forgive you. (No I can't). Either way, I'm sure you've at least heard about what Suh did. Here's a still from the moment before Suh stomps on Evan Dietrich-Smith's arm with his cleats.
Um, hi? This isn't the kindergarten playground. You can't just go around stomping on people. You are a grown-assed man and you can control your temper. Didn't you read our post about sportsmanship? Suh has been suspended three times already. And another suspension is expected to be dished out today. At what point does someone say "hey, this guy is a terrible employee and needs to be fired"? If this were any other job he would have been let go a long time ago.
But, this is the NFL. And apparently bullies are still allowed to make millions.
What do you think about this? Should players who deliberatly hurt other players be fined? Suspended? Released from the team?
Should you be allowed to kick another guy in the balls and get away with it? What has happened to sportsmanship?
UPDATE: Suh suspended for 2 games without pay.
Monday, November 28, 2011
First and foremost, as of right now, the situation at Syracuse and Penn State are completely different. Call me naive, but I supported Boeheim when he defended his friend. I truly don't think he believes the accusations. He's not Paterno. He didn't hear eye-witness reports of abuse from his grad assistant, report it to some authority and then sit back and do nothing while the abuse continued. The allegations have been investigated twice. Yes, TWO times. Once by the University and a second time by ESPN. In both instances, the evidence could not be corroborated. If I were in Boeheim's shoes I don't think I would have been anywhere near as restrained. But he's far more mature than me (or, more likely, being helped by a PR team) and issued what I think to be a great apology/reaction to the actions taken last night:
“The allegations that have come forth today are disturbing and deeply troubling. I am personally very shocked because I have never witnessed any of the activities that have been alleged. I believe the university took the appropriate step tonight. What is most important is that this matter be fully investigated and that anyone with information be supported to come forward so that the truth can be found. I deeply regret any statements I made that might have inhibited that from occurring or been insensitive to victims of abuse.”
If the University fires Boeheim for defending his friend, they will probably lose me as a fan (still upset with the Big East departure), unless they can prove he had knowledge of the abuse. Boeheim is loved for his passion and dedication to the program and the team. He should not be fired for it. The University has handled the situation extremely well, so far. Hopefully, they continue to do so.
As for what came out last night between the 3rd accuser and Fine's wife, I'm still not totally convinced. I know, I know! It looks bad, horrible even. But here's the thing. The original accuser had an affair with the wife. At 18. That whole situation is beyond weird, between asking Fine for money to pay off loans and the phone call recording. Which, why is ESPN waiting until now to release this tape? As for the 3rd accuser, he's got his own sexual assault charges from April AND his dad is vehemently denying everything he's said about Fine. Call me crazy, but in my experience, from watching criminal law shows, the 3rd accuser is not coming off as all that credible.
I'm honestly torn. If the accusations are true, I will feel horrible for not believing. Am I biased solely because I graduated from Cuse the year we won the national championship, having a special tie to the program and Boeheim? Would I still be suspicious of the timing if I hadn't? People were quick to attack me and the program when the original accusations came out (what I have to do with the situation, I'm still trying to figure out), but were they biased by their own dislike/jealousy/school pride that they wanted to see the bad? How would they react if the situations were reversed? How would I?
I was asked when the Penn State accusations/firings happened what I would do if it were Cuse (I can't remember who asked, but I need to find out and get their predictions on my future), I said it would be completely devastating. At least I know that to be the truth.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
If you've noticed that the men in your area are looking a little scruffier than usual - there's most likely a very good reason for it:
Welcome to MOVEMBER!
I know what you're thinking, but no, Movember is not a month-long tribute to the Gays (but how awesome would that be? Glitter and feather boas for EVERYBODY!) - it is a month-long moustache growing competition to raise money for the fight against prostate cancer.I am a big supporter of "the cause", and I think this is a great fundraising idea that brings attention to another sensitive area. It allows guys to raise some cash to save their man-parts and it also gives them a chance to grow an ironic 'stache without
The Edmonton Oilers are always happy to participate with Mo's of their own, and a number of the players, staff and media are sporting (or trying to sport) some spectacularly shaggy 'stache's.
Its great to see the guys getting into the spirit, even if I have longer, thicker leg hair than most of these guys are sporting on the upper lips.
There's still a couple of days left if you want to get in on some of the Mo action, you can head to the Movember website to make a donation, or visit my fellow FTS contributor, Cathy at Antsy Pants - she has been auctioning off items throughout the month with all the proceeds going to the Movember cause (though, I'll give you advance warning that I will be winning her next item).
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Regardless, we can (and do) still have opinions on cadets getting drafted after graduation (and the Army's subsequent reluctance to release them from a 3-year service contract).
To give you a bit of background, West Point cadets receive a college education, paid in full, in exchange for military service after graduation. They are also required to participate in some form of competitive athletics. The school is most well-known for their football team. Go Army! Beat Navy!
Thanksgiving is upon us…which is strange since we already had a blizzard here in the Northeast a month ago. One of the great traditions of Thanksgiving…aside from the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving special…is that we get football…which allows us to get away from our annoying relatives that we only see once a year. Just say that you have a lot of money bet on the game or that you have several players to watch on our fantasy team…they’ll have no idea what you are talking about and they will leave you in peace to enjoy the games!
Traditionally, the Detroit Lions and Dallas Cowboys play on Thanksgiving Day…Detroit started in 1934 and Dallas in 1966. Sometimes these games are terrible…Detroit was bad for a long time resulting in a blowout and when Dallas was really good, that game would be a blowout also. However, there have been some memorable moments…here in New York, we remember Lawrence Taylor returning an interception for a 97 yard touchdown in 1982. Then there was the Leon Lett game in 1993 when he stupidly slid in the snow to touch a blocked field goal which let the Dolphins beat the Cowboys 16-13. The 1998 game between the Steelers and the Lions led to a rule change regarding the overtime calling of heads or tails…when Jerome Bettis called the toss he said “Hea-tails”, but the referee heard “heads-tails” and the ref said he called heads first which was binding. Now…the team has to call the coin before it’s tossed. Toss that piece of trivia at your relatives if any of the games to go OT…they will think you are making it up.
So…history aside…let’s look at this week’s games, which are being lauded as maybe the best lineup ever.
First up, 12:30 start, right after the parade…Packers-Lions where we have the Pack undefeated and the Lions, who are faltering a bit since their hot start, capable of handing Green Bay their first loss. They gave up a lot of points this week to Cam Newton and Carolina, but outscored them in a slugfest. They won’t have that luxury against the stingy Packer defense this week so they will need to tighten up defensively and keep Aaron Rodgers from putting up Madden video game numbers. Raise your hand if Clay Matthews has better hair than you do.
4:15 brings us the Cowboys and Miami in big D. This game didn’t look like much a few weeks ago, but Miami has taken themselves out of the Suck for Luck campaign by winning 3 in a row. Dallas has the inside track on the NFC East division crown, but this still won’t be an easy game for them with the surging Dolphins and their renewed attack on both sides of the ball. Plus, they have the Leon Lett factor to deal with. Just for fun, bet your family that they show the replay of him slipping the first time Miami lines up for a field goal.
Last, but definitely not least at 8:20, 49’ers at Ravens. First one to 3 points wins. They will make too much about the first time brothers are coaching against each other in the NFL. Get past that and enjoy the game. San Fran could be playing for the #1 seed, depending on what happens in the early game with Green Bay, and both defenses are great at stopping the run, so get set for a grind it out defensive struggle. Frank Gore, if healthy, and Ray Rice are 2 of the best backs in the league, so whichever offensive line allows them to run better will probably win the game.
So there you have it, a quick and dirty analysis of the turkey day games to impress or bore your relatives…depending on how much tryptophan they have consumed…or, if you are Italian, how much lasagna. Have a great Thanksgiving everyone!!!
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
I know what you're thinking. "Buck Up, SurferWife. What's got you so blue?"
Funny you say blue. Because it's something blue and gold that's making me want to hurl myself off a cliff.
Really? Five consecutive losses? Last place in the AFC West? 17 interceptions, Rivs? My stomach hurts, so I am going to leave you with this: Try not to choke on it:
It must feel good to be a Raiders fan.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Thursday, November 17, 2011
This time of year becomes the most exciting. We are down to 3 or less games per team in the division and the stakes are high. Highest currently for teams like Alabama and LSU. LSU is undefeated and they are looking sharp, and I'm really sad we weren't able to take them in our house two weeks ago. "Our House" meaning Tuscaloosa, I don't live in the stadium, but you know what I mean, right? This time of year is exciting because EVERY team that is in the top of there division is in the hung not only for Bowl games but more importantly Division Championship runs AND most importantly National Championship runs.
This years National Championship is being played in New Orleans. Talk about one hell of an electric town to have something like this go down, especially if there is an SEC team involved - even more so if that team is LSU. Can you imagine the buzz going down on Bourbon Street if this happens? And I'm not talking about the buzz from the frozen drinks as large as your head either.
I'm still a bit bitter that we lost to LSU, and I'd love a rematch! And apparently 2 SEC teams have never gone head to head at the National Championships so it would be even more exciting!
My husband, Mike and I have had a pact since the beginning of the season. When we learned the Championship game would be held in New Orleans we said come hell or high water... bad choice of words, Sorry New Orleans, we love you! We would make it to NOLA for the game if Alabama made it to the National Championship game. His younger brother was in for the trip as well. Now granted, hotels are booked, and over the top expensive and this would probably require us to not only sleep in our Jeep but also forego showers but we don't care. It's Alabama football, its 48 hours and there are frozen drinks to be had and fun to be made. Win or lose we would be there for the night. And no we won't be purchasing tickets to the game but instead watching them from the comfort of a bar stool somewhere in the French Quarter.
Our hopes were extremely high at the beginning of the season. The boys looked great, and still do... well minus our kicker that seems to be having some issues and a few other moments here and there but for the most part we still have a winning team with a great looking defense. LSU just really let us have it for sure. I felt like we may not have showed up as well as we could have but that being said I don't play football, I can't play and I have no right to tell those boys how to do it better. That's Saban's job.
In the past weeks there has been a lot of buzz about who might go to the National Championships - of course everyone here is now hoping for a rematch with LSU vs. AL. And I would be happy about that for sure, but I'm still hanging on to a hope that Oklahoma State University and Alabama might reach New Orleans together for match up. My feeling in this is a little selfish. Mike's sister is OSU alumni and made the comment she would definitely try to make it to the game from Colorado if her beloved Cowboys made it to the big dance. SO you see Mike + Me + His Sister + His Brother = ONE HELL OF A GREAT TIME!!!
The buzz around here is there everyone has started with the "WHAT IF'S" and "ALL WE NEED IS" and "IF THEY LOSE THEN THIS HAPPENS" going on around here. Every morning while at work I hear this from my co-workers talking football around the coffee maker. When I get home, or on the weekends I hear the same from Mike. And while watching Game Day on Saturday morning I hear it a lot too. Mike and I also have taken to watching ESPN in the morning while getting ready for work too [always loved sports, but never thought I'd be that girl]. Little by little I hear more and more about the what ifs...
I wanted to share a typical exchange of how this all goes down, written by my husband for those of you SEC outsiders that may or may not do this in your divisions when it gets down to the boiling point for the end of the season.
So here goes, predictions/what ifs/maybes/only if this/then it will happen: By Mike!
[my comments in pink]
"Here’s what can happen. The most likely conclusion is LSU vs Okie State in the National Championship Game. But, if Okie State loses any of its final games, then Bama could move up to its spot to face LSU, which would be not only the first time that two teams from the same conference would face each other in the National Championship Game, but also from the same division. The coolness factor of the rematch? LSU beat Bama in over-time by three points in Tuscaloosa. The rematch would happen in New Orleans. [Home field advantage is sometimes scary for the opposing team! YIKES! Super Dome Crowd mostly for LSU, that's some scurry shit!] LSU still has to play a very good Arkansas team [Hogs are my 2nd favorite in the SEC division]. So, if Arkansas beats LSU, then we have a three way tie for SEC West Division Champs. So, who would go to Atlanta for the SEC Championship game? Alabama. They would be higher in the BCS rankings. If they make it through Georgia Southern and Auburn.
So, then Alabama goes on to the SEC Champ game, beats Georgia. Then, who do they face in the National Championship Game? If Okie State holds on, and doesn’t lose, then it would be them. If they were to lose, I would suspect Bama would play Oregon, [UGH, SO. OVER. THE DUCKS!] or Oklahoma. Which is funny, because both of those teams were projected early on to play each other in the National. Champ. Game.
Personally, I’m hoping on Bama and Okie State. Bama’s smothering defense vs Okie State’s high octane offense." [I'm hoping for the same, and speaking of Octane... I'll drink a 190 Octane from Fat Tuesday's to that!].
So you see folks, this is what I hear day in and day out around here.... You know I'm a happy camper regardless of who makes it to the National Championships so long as it's ALABAMA! But I will have to wait and see, continue listening to the "IF WE DO THIS'S" and hope for the best! For now we have Georgia Southern to work on and then the game of all games every year is the IRON BOWL when we take on our biggest rivals, the Tigers of Auburn University. We have big fish to fry before we can make it anywhere near New Orleans or Atlanta.
ROLL TIDE ROLL!!!
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Luckily, it's the good ol' boys for the most part (aka players from the 70's), and they are all stellar people. I was lucky enough to go to the game with coworkers, as we were gifted seats from a former Cowboy. Needless to say, the seats were amazing. It was my first time at JerryWorld, and I was surprisingly impressed. I expected to be disgusted with the stadium. I mean, we call it the DeathStar here. It was however, much more massive than I expected. I don't know how all those people fit in there. It's really a feat of engineering and architecture. So, with my usual sneer already dissipating with the stadium impressing me, my guard started breaking down.
The Boys played great, in fact they scored more than they had in 4 years, breaking their game high score in 2007. And I started cheering . . . for the Cowboys. It was the strangest thing. I got excited. It was fun watching these rookies run the ball so well. I still made jokes and laughed at Romo, but that was never going to change. I stood up and cheered at touchdowns and interceptions. Who was I?
One of my coworkers did the same. She blamed the atmosphere. It was a interesting concept. I couldn't for the life of me figure out why I was enjoying cheering the Cowboys on. Maybe it was the atmosphere. There was so much excitement and love for the Cowboys. It was like you couldn't not become a part of it.
I don't really like the NFL, I really love college football, but there was something about being in that stadium. Cheering on a team I don't like. Excitement really is contagious. If it weren't for the owner, I probably would be a Cowboys fan now.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
So I asked my husband. He suggested writing about the Wisconsin domination over Minnesota this past weekend. In college football the Badgers won and will keep the Paul Bunyan Axe. In hockey, they split the series, which is considerable because the Gophers are ranked #1. In the NFL....well, obviously the Packers won, that's what we do.
He suggested I talk about Joe Frazier. Yes, his death is major news in the sports world, but not anything I am qualified to talk about. Then he mentioned how some UFC guy who wasn't supposed to lose a match for 2 years almost lost...or something. I don't even know what he was thinking, talking to me about boxing.
Moving along. Penn state? No, I'll keep my anger inside my own head. NBA lockout? Is anyone even aware that the season hasn't started? NCAA basketball....I'll wait until April. Don't want to get the March Madness started too early.
Hmm...Well, we are a site dedicated to sports, fandom and fitness so maybe I should talk about my fitness goals. That's all I've been talking about on my personal blog lately so why not spill it over here too. I signed up for a half marathon! This is exciting and scary. As of right now I can run about 4 miles.
Yep. A half is 13.1 miles. I said I can do 4. I am well aware that I have The Crazy right now. Good news is, the race isn't until May so I have all winter to train. Bad news is I live in the frozen tundra that is Minnesota so running outside is pretty much impossible for the next 4 to 5 months. Training for a half on the treadmill probably isn't ideal, but I'll work with what I got.
Also, yes, this is me blatantly asking you for encouragement. I CAN ONLY RUN 4 MILES RIGHT NOW! Tell me I will be able to make it through this training and I will not die on the Door County peninsula. The other day my husband told me he had never seen someone so determined to do something they were so bad at. I decided to take it as a compliment. Finally! My stubbornness is coming in handy!
I am very sorry for the randomness of this post. But like I said, the auction is taking up all my brain space.
Monday, November 14, 2011
- The Niners are 8-1. Eight AND One. 8 wins, 1 loss. Yes, I have to repeat it just to believe it. I loved when ESPN ranked them #2 the last two weeks, but I'm not sure I really believed until now.
- Eli Manning with 2 pick 6's (or is it 2 picks 6?), and couldn't finish the job. We all know SurferWife is happy!
- Apparently the NFC West didn't like all the shit talked about how bad they are and took it out on those East coast teams. Heh. (As a Niners fan I shouldn't want this, but I can't help but defend the league)
- Mike Matheny takes over for LaRussa as the STL Cardinals manager. I LOVE Matheny and couldn't be happier for him. Good Luck!
- I think there might be a new obnoxious fan base rivaling Duke and Ohio St...Oregon! Every time I see "OOOOOO" written out all I can think of is Office Space. And could sportscasters/writers be anymore up the Duck's ass? I don't really care about the Pac-10/12 teams, but now we're going to be hearing even more about Oregon. I might have to move again.
- The Ravens and Cowboys are battling it out for most bipolar team in the NFL. I wish the Cowboys would just stick with depression. Who needs the high?
- What is up with the kidnappings in Venezuela? I'm so glad Ramos is alive and well, but it's treated like no big deal because it happens so much. Um, pretty sure kidnapping is a big deal. Maybe that's just me.
- During the down years of my Niners fandom I started watching the Bears. I graduated HS with Lance Briggs so I've followed his career since. His hit against Johnson made me sad. The whole game just felt dirty, and not the good dirty. More like Raiders or Steelers dirty.
- Shana already covered the horrible Penn State scandal, but what has come out since makes me nauseous. Apparently there's even more that has yet to be released. At this point I'm not sure I want to know.
Friday, November 11, 2011
But that will have to wait, because I have something very important to talk to you about. Consider it a public service announcement without the famous face and the "The More You Know" shooting star across your screen.
You need a personal trainer.
Don't take offence - I think you look fantastic, I just think that everyone can benefit from the knowledge and skills of a personal trainer.
Now, I know what you're thinking - I do just fine on my own. I get Fitness magazine and I have a gym membership, so what do I need a trainer for? I have no interest in having someone scream at me and tell me I'm disgusting to motivate me. No, thank you, I'll stick to my Fitness magazine.
Until I started working out with a personal trainer!
So I have compiled a list of reasons why everybody who cares even remotely about their health should see a personal trainer:
- a good personal trainer can design a work out just for you - You want to bulk up? Slim down? Run longer? Faster? Harder? You want 6-pack abs but hate doing crunches? No problem; a good personal trainer can assess your strengths and needs, and help you achieve your goals.
- a good personal trainer makes sure you doing shit right - I don't know how many squats I have done in my lifetime - MANY - and before I started working with a personal trainer, do you know how many I was doing correctly? ZERO! A good trainer can help you isolate the muscles that should be working and give you tips and tricks to help you along the way.
- a good personal training will keep it interesting - I used to go to the gym, pop in my iPod and go through the motions of my usual routine. Now I go to the gym, I chat and laugh with my trainer and learn new and interesting things about how and why my body works the way it does.
- a good personal trainer will test your boundaries but will recognize when you're at your limit - When I worked out on my own, it was easy for me to give up because something was hard, or I would be stubborn and push myself too much until I hurt myself. A trainer will challenge you, nudge you to the brink of your comfort zone, but can recognize when you've had enough.
- a good personal trainer will never berate you, insult you, yell at you, judge you, or otherwise make you feel bad about yourself - I can be having the absolute, edge-of-sanity, worst day imaginable, but about 5 minutes into my workout with my trainer, it is all gone and I feel motivated and energized and happy.
- a good personal trainer will support you - I'm not talking about emotional support, like "You're doing awesome, keep up the good work" (though they will do that too), I am talking about actually physically supporting you so that you don't fall over...which happens to me more often than you would think.
And if you are so lucky to find a personal trainer who is also a trained massage therapist (like mine is) - hold on to that unicorn and never let them go because that is a magical creature that has a unique expertise to know what is going on in your body and exactly how to get it working at its best.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
I don't remember my parents ever taking me to the track as a WeeAlly, but then they hardly go now. Keeneland meets for 4 weeks in the spring and 4 weeks in the fall and Churchill Downs opens as soon as Keeneland closes. Although we drive past thoroughbred farms like most people drive past McDonald's (as in, there is one on every block), I didn't actively attend the horse races until my sophomore year in college. But once I started, just like with any wicked addiction, I couldn't stop.
There is a savvy (and somewhat snarky) article on Grantland.com by Charles Pierce that explores the decline of horse racing. His argument is that in a world of Snookies and 20-minute marriages between models and baseball players, there is simply no more room for the sport. Ironically, the fastest 2 minutes in sports can't keep up. The sport is archaic. Even the recent Breeders' Cup, which took place last Saturday at our very own Churchill Downs, was overshadowed by the "Battle Between the Exes"...meaning the over-hyped engagement between 2 well-established jockeys that lasted about 5 minutes. The story of Mike Smith and Chantal Sutherland (who is an accomplished jockey in her own right and needs to stop seeking her 15 minutes of fame by mounting anything with less than 4 legs) hijacked most of the Breeders' Cup coverage, with the exception of Amazombie's win in the Breeders' Cup Sprint. Amazombie...the horse that the breeder "threw in" with the purchase of another horse.
This is not to say that each nationally covered horse race doesn't have a story, because it does. The 70-year old jockey that finally made it to the big leagues...the horse that no one wanted, who went on to win a major race and make his owners obnoxiously rich...the race that broke a million hearts. There is always a story, but when we create drama around any relationship that didn't work out (whether it's between jockeys or a jockey and an owner or even a horse and an owner), it stoops to the level of reality television and there is certainly no place for that in horse racing. Perhaps that explains the decline in the sport. We, as a country, have become conditioned to a level of entertainment in which horse racing will always fall short. But maybe it's a call to be better than the trash we've been collecting from the airwaves.
I have one single rule when I attend the horse races. No denim. Fancy, floppy hat or not, I refuse to wear denim. It's like dressing for the theater or even for church on Sunday morning. It's a standard that I have set for myself based on the history and expectations of the location. The thoroughbred industry (especially in Kentucky) is trapped in an antiquated period of time. But does that necessarily make it obsolete? Legislators can't figure out a way to pass a law which would allow the installation of slot machines at the tracks. Track officials argue they need the revenue that slot machines bring in to keep the tracks open. Why does it have to be that way? Where are the people who love the sport of horse racing and with what are they replacing that love? I'm not so sure that chasing the wants and whims of the public is the answer for horse racing. My darkest day would be walking into Keeneland, only to find bars with strippers next to slot machines next to a jockey freak show. I would never go back.
I am the first to admit that not everyone loves sports (my husband would rather watch HGTV than Sunday afternoon football. This doesn't make him gay, it simply makes him incredibly handy), but I've established a new goal for myself. I will share my unbridled passion for horse racing with everyone who watches a race with me. When that pack makes the turn from the back stretch and thunders toward the finish line, jockeys hovering over completely extended thoroughbreds, they will be yelling just as loudly as me: Go, Baby, Go!
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
This morning, it was announced that Joe Paterno would step down as head coach at the end of this season. Some people are calling for his immediate resignation while others would like to see him remain as head coach.
I understand why people would want him to stay…why they don’t want to believe he did anything wrong. The man is a legend. He’s the oldest and most winning coach in college football. He’s an institution…and now his legacy and his 46 year career as head coach will forever be tarnished by this scandal. It’s really unfortunate.
However, what happened to those kids was tragic. If the allegations are true, those children’s lives were changed forever at the hands of Jerry Sandusky.
Now, I wasn’t there. I don’t know exactly what happened. But it seems that that people knew about what was happening…they could have stopped it, but they chose to do nothing. It seems as though they chose the reputation of their school and their football team over the well being of those kids. And that is completely unacceptable.
If Joe Paterno was one of those people…one of the ones who knew and did nothing to stop it, then he deserves whatever happens…and he should step down now.
What do you think? Did Joe know what was going on? Should he have done more? Or is he just caught up in an unfortunate scandal?
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
After interning at MLB (where you think celebrity/athlete encounters would be everywhere, they were not, boo), I went to work at a restaurant in the lovely town of Hoboken, NJ. Quite a few of the NY athletes lived in the area (Giants, Jets, and Nets play in NJ) and The Restaurant was the place to be. I mean, really, who wouldn't want to stop by the place I worked? <---Right?
Once a week, I had the pleasure of greeting Eli Manning<---What?! *BARF* Gag, gag *BARF* HUTCH! His name should never appear on my blog*Upchuck* as he took his place at the end of the bar. Very quiet and polite,<---Polite my San Diegan ass he would either watch Sports Center or read the paper. Every so often he brought in his now wife, a drop-dead-gorgeous-super-nice-makes-me-hate-my-life-blonde,<---She's stupid. Just for marrying such a piece of crap for dinner. Not that exciting, right? Don't worry, it gets better.<---I hope so because I am betraying America's Finest City by letting you talk about the assinine who was too good to play for the Chargers. What? I'm not bitter nor do I hold a grudge. Unless it's about snot nosed Eli. Ew. Ok, sorry. Continue.
Shortly after the '05-'06 season ended for the Colts and Giants, I was standing at the bar on a slow lunch day, working on my sudoko from AM New York.<---If I were a man I would totally crush on you. A smart, sporty girl? Nothing better. The door opens and I see 4 ridiculously tall men walk in. Picking my jaw up off the floor, I realized I was standing in the presence of greatness...all 3 Manning brothers and Archie! I'm not even sure what I said. "Welcome to The Restaurant" most likely came out as "kjasdfljdfjdfhgoiuerncvoi." If you can understand that, points for you!<---Get your shit together, Hutch.
Walking them to their table, my hands (and probably my whole body) shook with each menu I gave out. THEN, they started asking me questions. "Where are you from?" "How did you get all the way out here?" They wanted to know about ME. Some nobody from a small town in California, who happened to be the luckiest person alive at that very moment. I somehow managed to pull it together and even had an actual conversation with Peyton about Dwight Freeney (he was drafted by the Colts my junior year at Cuse).
Hearing the southern accent turned me into complete mush! If not for the manager coming over and rudely interrupting me, they would have pulled up a chair and asked me to join them. I'm sure of this. Instead, I watched from afar while they ate and laughed.
Cooper, my pick as the hottest of the 3, mocked Eli and Peyton for their playoff losses<---I like this Cooper. I tend to mock the Mannings as well as I found myself daydreaming about what it would be like to grow up in the Manning fam, or perhaps even marry into it, hmmm.<----Bite your tongue.
Peyton jarred me out of fantasyland by flashing a smile and saying, "Thanks Hutch. it was great to meet you, my life will never be the same"<---While he IS a COLT (Boo!) I do kinda dig the guy. He has a sense of humor and I loooooove that, so I will accept your offer as maid of honor when you two marry as they walked out. Ok, that's a bit of a fabrication, but he did say thanks! Of course my inability to formulate a coherent sentence kicked back in and I'm sure I mumbled something while turning bright red (damn the Irish heritage!).
And that was it, they were gone. By the Fall of 2006, I was fully engulfed in the corporate world and would never see Eli or his family again.<---No loss on the lack of Eli sightings. Gag*Ralph*Gag
Even though my incredible wit let me down during a crucial moment in my life, nothing will ever top the 90 minutes I spent with the Manning Dynasty. Sadly, we weren't allowed to take pics with "celebrities" while working. Lame, I know, but the mental pics will last a lifetime, or at least until the senility sets in.
Thanks Hutch! How awesome for you to meet Archie, Cooper and Peyton Manning!! I would probably be all star struck, too. And my condolences on having to share oxygen with the snot nosed little douchemask Eli.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Word on the street is your season might not happen...AT ALL. I've heard many of you whine and moan about what to do in the meantime. You're at a loss on how to fill the giant void in your life the lack of NBA basketball has left. No longer will you have superstar athletes, who make the game all about them, to watch.
Fret not, I have a solution.
There's a game with such a fast pace it makes watching the NBA feel like you're actually watching golf. The players of this game even work together to win. Yes, a TEAM sport! The same game has a playoff system college football envies, but can't figure out how to replicate. With this game you can dedicate an entire month to drinking, brackets and all around Madness (combines very well with St. Patrick's Day instead of conflicting with family holidays, like, say, Christmas?).
I think you can guess where I'm going.
Now is the perfect time to try out college basketball. If you don't have a team to follow, Syracuse will gladly take the bandwagon fans, going in to the season ranked #5, we're not a bad bet (I don't care what Grantland says, I will always refer to my teams as "we"). Or try a local team. Big East, SEC, ACC, PAC-12...I'm sure you can find a team to love.
You've had time to complain (and I do get how upsetting losing a season can be), but now it's time to stop pouting and do something about it. Unless you're directly involved in the negotiations I think college basketball is the best solution you will find. You never know, you might actually enjoy it.
Hutch, a former NBA fan
P.S. I have a bet with Ally on our teams (U of Kentucky and Cuse). Whoever's teams goes further in the season is the winner, and the loser buys the other dinner. I still need to pick a Sacramento restaurant, surprisingly enough there's a lot to choose from here.
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Which are you? I'm a joiner with MLB, I don't follow all year long. But come playoffs, I'm all about it. NBA? I'm a lifer. Live and breath. College football? I'm a lifer. NFL? I could actually care less.
Since I don't have any NBA to watch any time soon, I'm stuck with all football. College and NFL. Well, college is still very exciting, but the NFL is really starting to drag. At least in these parts.
Here's my question, what does a city do when it's top billing teams are either not playing at all due to a lockout, or are technically playing, but really still not playing at all? Yes, Cowboys, I'm talking about you. Deal with it. The Dallas Mavericks just won the NBA Championship. Now that's all well and good that the Mavs are looking at a two season Championship without actually having to do anything, but what is it doing to fans and the city itself? People aren't buying merchandise because the excitement is gone. The arena isn't making its money because it's not full, which means all those people are basically out of jobs (most are hourly wages), and it just trickles down from there.
Well, even thought the NFL is playing, the Cowboys are just not playing well. And Dallas is known to be a joiner/bandwagon city, so that means the crowds will diminish at JerryWorld. Which means less revenue, and on and on and on.
So, not only are people's ideas of sports and good feelings toward the city and teams going downhill, the economy is potentially too. Am I putting too much stalk in this? Maybe. But it's worth a thought.
So, what do you do? Do you just become a lifer and support and spend the money anyways? Can that happen if the passion isn't there? How does the team survive if the fans go away?
I don't have a clue, but it's worth a thought.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Yes! M for Moustache.
I can talk about the 'stache. Why? Because my dad wears one.
Because my Great Great Grandfather totally rocked one.
Because I get my upper lip waxed on the regular. What? I'm hairy.
What the heck is Movember? According to their website it's a moustache growing charity event held during November each year that raises funds and awareness for men's health. Men start with a clean shave Nov 1 and grow their 'staches all month. They raise money and awareness for cancers that affect men, like prostate and testicular. Sometimes they get their lady friends involved (like me). Women are known as a MoSistas while the men are MoBros.
Because I'm an overachiever I came up with some fun money raising ideas. Throughout Movember I'll be auctioning off some handmade items over on my personal blog. Lovely things made by fellow bloggers you know and love. There'll be things for men and women and maybe even babies, who knows! I know a lot of crafty bloggers and guarantee you'll want what they have to offer; if not for yourself then for Christmas presents!
I'll explain the details over at Antsy Pants within the next few days. Right now, you just need to now that it's Movember. And things are gonna start happening. You don't want to miss a minute of the action...or any of those fun handmade things I was talking about. There may even be a giveaway. If you donate. Details soon.
Why am I talking about this on a sports blog? Because we just spent a whole month talking about Breast Cancer, now it's time to show the men some love!
Head over to my Mo' page and take a look around the Movember site.
The Dirt Reynolds for the win!