I have to admit...I was stressing over this post. I had no idea what to write about. It's not basketball season yet. The NFL lockout is over but the season hasn't started yet. I haven't been in a baseball sort of mood lately. I was totally stuck.
I asked my boyfriend J what I should write about. His answer...the NFL lockout...which is over...and also overdone.
So I called my friend SJ. He's like a sports encyclopedia...if anyone was going to be able to give me a good idea, he was the man to do it.
Our conversation was a little nutty and went something like this...
Me: Hi...so you know how during baseball games the announcers talk about all sorts of random crap...like, they'll say "No team has ever come back from a deficit of five runs in the third game of a four game series...on a day when the sun is out and there's a northeast wind..."
SJ: Yeah..."on a Thursday...on the road." Yes...they say stuff like that all the time...because baseball is slow and they have to fill air time. What about it?
Me: Well...I have to write a post for this blog that my friend started and it's about sports...written by chicks...but not girlie...and my first post is tomorrow and I have no idea what to write about...so I thought I'd write about how baseball announcers make up random statistics, but...I wanted some examples and I tried googling it and I got nothing. So I'm stuck. Help.
SJ: Did you watch the women's world cup?
SJ: That's OK...I did.
Me: That's great...how is that helping me?
SJ: You should write about the women's world cup and how it's bullshit that they won the game on penalty kicks.
Me: I know nothing about soccer what does that mean?
SJ: Well...(I'd love to give you SJ's explanation here...but it was boring and I didn't understand it and I've forgotten it already)...see what I mean?
Me: No...I don't see at all. I don't speak soccer. Please explain in words I can understand.
SJ: It's like playing nine innings of baseball and then deciding the winner by having a home run contest.
Me: Got it...but if I don't understand it, how am I going to write about it?
SJ: I'll write it for you.
Me: That's cheating. Actually...I read something the other day about how easy everyone went on the women's soccer team...and how everyone was patting them on the back even though they lost...and how no one would have done that if they were men. Maybe I should write about that.
SJ: That's a good idea too. I'll write that up and send it over to you.
Me: I think it would be awesome to have the job of making up all the crap that baseball announcers say during the games. How do I get that job?
SJ: There is a sports reporter...Suzy Kolber...once she interviewed Joe Namath...and he was drunk, of course...and he told her he wanted to kiss her...you should write about that.
As it turns out...SJ was not as helpful as I thought he'd be.
Although...I guess he helped me write this post after all.