Tuesday, November 8, 2011

It's a Manning Dynasty Encounter

Both Hutch and I feel it is important that you take a gander at this celebrity encounter she had.  This article aired on my blog in September of 2010.  THIS IS HUTCH'S ENCOUNTER.  You will find my angry jibberish in purple.  Please keep in mind that this was already featured over at Surferwife.


After interning at MLB (where you think celebrity/athlete encounters would be everywhere, they were not, boo), I went to work at a restaurant in the lovely town of Hoboken, NJ. Quite a few of the NY athletes lived in the area (Giants, Jets, and Nets play in NJ) and The Restaurant was the place to be. I mean, really, who wouldn't want to stop by the place I worked? <---Right?

Once a week, I had the pleasure of greeting Eli Manning<---What?! *BARF* Gag, gag *BARF* HUTCH! His name should never appear on my blog*Upchuck* as he took his place at the end of the bar. Very quiet and polite,<---Polite my San Diegan ass he would either watch Sports Center or read the paper. Every so often he brought in his now wife, a drop-dead-gorgeous-super-nice-makes-me-hate-my-life-blonde,<---She's stupid. Just for marrying such a piece of crap for dinner. Not that exciting, right? Don't worry, it gets better.<---I hope so because I am betraying America's Finest City by letting you talk about the assinine who was too good to play for the Chargers. What? I'm not bitter nor do I hold a grudge. Unless it's about snot nosed Eli. Ew. Ok, sorry. Continue.

Shortly after the '05-'06 season ended for the Colts and Giants, I was standing at the bar on a slow lunch day, working on my sudoko from AM New York.<---If I were a man I would totally crush on you. A smart, sporty girl? Nothing better. The door opens and I see 4 ridiculously tall men walk in. Picking my jaw up off the floor, I realized I was standing in the presence of greatness...all 3 Manning brothers and Archie! I'm not even sure what I said. "Welcome to The Restaurant" most likely came out as "kjasdfljdfjdfhgoiuerncvoi." If you can understand that, points for you!<---Get your shit together, Hutch.

Walking them to their table, my hands (and probably my whole body) shook with each menu I gave out. THEN, they started asking me questions. "Where are you from?" "How did you get all the way out here?" They wanted to know about ME. Some nobody from a small town in California, who happened to be the luckiest person alive at that very moment. I somehow managed to pull it together and even had an actual conversation with Peyton about Dwight Freeney (he was drafted by the Colts my junior year at Cuse).

Hearing the southern accent turned me into complete mush! If not for the manager coming over and rudely interrupting me, they would have pulled up a chair and asked me to join them. I'm sure of this. Instead, I watched from afar while they ate and laughed.

Cooper, my pick as the hottest of the 3, mocked Eli and Peyton for their playoff losses<---I like this Cooper. I tend to mock the Mannings as well as I found myself daydreaming about what it would be like to grow up in the Manning fam, or perhaps even marry into it, hmmm.<----Bite your tongue.

Peyton jarred me out of fantasyland by flashing a smile and saying, "Thanks Hutch. it was great to meet you, my life will never be the same"<---While he IS a COLT (Boo!) I do kinda dig the guy. He has a sense of humor and I loooooove that, so I will accept your offer as maid of honor when you two marry as they walked out. Ok, that's a bit of a fabrication, but he did say thanks! Of course my inability to formulate a coherent sentence kicked back in and I'm sure I mumbled something while turning bright red (damn the Irish heritage!).

And that was it, they were gone. By the Fall of 2006, I was fully engulfed in the corporate world and would never see Eli or his family again.<---No loss on the lack of Eli sightings. Gag*Ralph*Gag

Even though my incredible wit let me down during a crucial moment in my life, nothing will ever top the 90 minutes I spent with the Manning Dynasty. Sadly, we weren't allowed to take pics with "celebrities" while working. Lame, I know, but the mental pics will last a lifetime, or at least until the senility sets in.


Thanks Hutch! How awesome for you to meet Archie, Cooper and Peyton Manning!! I would probably be all star struck, too. And my condolences on having to share oxygen with the snot nosed little douchemask Eli.

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